Where I've Come From, What I've Learned

Life is so full of expectations met, failed, and totally caught off guard. This time, I've been completely taken by surprise at the news that

I "have been chosen by Vancouver Olympic Broadcasting Services to work as part of their Olympic broadcasting staff during the Vancouver 2010 Olympic Games"

I can see now, so clearly, how the Lord has put every little phase in my life - every decision, obstacle, disappointment, joy - to bring me to where I am now. And for that, I can take absolutely no credit.

Here's the story.

When I was 12 years old, I began figure skating - really, I was tagging along with my best friend who had just taken up the sport (yes, it is a sport). Immediately, I was hooked. It wasn't long before I was spending my after school hours, Saturday mornings (reporting on the ice at 6am), and entire summers at the rink. I performed in small competitions around the southeast, and even ventured to Lake Placid, NY to compete at a rink there. Before you begin to think that I was some sort of professional, I have to admit that the skating I did was more recreational and artistic than what you see on TV. Sure, I was able to do some jumps and spins, but that wasn't going to get me anywhere for a career. From this, I learned about conflict, jealousy, the pressures for attention and perfection, and most importantly, where I fit into it all.

My freshman year of high school, I had completely replaced figure skating with a different art - film. I started up a film club with my best friend, and we made a few short films, entering them in little local film festivals. I knew that I wanted to pursue film in college, so I chose Asbury. It was a perfect fit for me - a Christian college with dedicated students and a Media Communication program blew anything else I was even considering out of the water and into some obscure other dimension. But it wasn't that easy - my ACT score was just shy of good scholarship money, so I had to rely on the Lord to continue to lead me - otherwise I would have ended up at UT. And lead He did, what a good promise, that He was already going before me, preparing the way.

Well, it was another lesson to learn, but I didn't actually find out I would be at Asbury until early April, when most of my friends were already picking out their bedding for their dorms and coordinating with their roommates. You see, I seem to have developed a need for control in my youth, that the Lord is constantly working with me on. I've learned, slowly, to trust Him as I should trust a perfect father. After so much of an emotional roller coaster, you cannot imagine my relief that I would actually be attending the college I had pursued for so long. But with the Lord's provision, I had to live up to the professors' expectations for me that were forming quickly.

My freshman year felt like a tremendous disappointment to me. By the end of the year, I had only taken 1 media class, and I had lost the drive that I had come in with. I did not make a film for highbridge, which many were expecting me to do. I was void of inspiration and know-how. Not to mention totally intimidated. I was meeting people that I had seen in the films while I was in high school - they were my peers, my competition.

In the spring of my freshman year, I applied for the Olympics. Sure, I knew how slim of a possibility I had as a sophomore, but I took to heart the Spanish saying, "el no, ya lo tenemos", which means "we already have the 'no'". By not applying for it, I knew for certain I wouldn't go, so why not apply and see what happens?

After applying, I found a new resolve to get involved in whatever I could. I joined a class that summer that would produce the live video feed to the jumbotrons at Ichthus, a music festival just down the road from Asbury. I took a summer class online - a gen-ed, to get it out of the way. I also applied for 2 different leadership positions - RA of my residence hall, and TAG leader. The RA was a year-long commitment, TAG only the first semester. In my interview for RA, I didn't feel it was right not to tell them that I had applied for the Olympics, so I did. Later I found out that I was not selected to be an RA. But the Lord knew what He was doing!

The first batch of Olympic students were selected that summer, which did not include myself. I wasn't sad in the least, because I knew how slim chances of me going were.

I was accepted as a TAG Leader and after countless hours of training and leading, the Lord blessed my partner and myself with the most wonderful group of TAG members who have taught me more than they'll ever know. Because of TAG, I was on campus before most, and was able to get my application in to work the front desk of the Media Comm building. I was enrolled in 2 media classes for the fall semester, and fully intended to make the most of them. Finally! I had a face in the media building! I thank the Lord for that desk job because I was able to get to know my professors in a much more real way, and I was beginning to feel like they knew me, too.

As my media classes progressed, I was relieved by how much I enjoyed them, and a little surprised by how much time and effort I was spending on them. But all the effort and stress was totally and completely worth it.

September, then October, finally November and December with absolutely no word about the Olympics, so I had resolved to go after graduation to London. It's in Europe, the people there have really great accents, I could get used to the idea. After all, I'm not a figure skater anymore.

When my family planned our Christmas break to be spent with family in Spain, I decided to take the opportunity to conduct an independent study on food and culture (who could have guessed). The class counts for 3 credits in the spring semester, but as an independent study, I don't have to go to class - just write a 12-page paper and submit it by the end of the semester (which fits very nicely with the Olympic schedule)! :)

We arrived in Knoxville, and I began to see facebook status changes regarding the Olympics. Could it be? More spots filled? Surely I am not one.

But sure enough, I received an email Wednesday evening and immediately accepted. Words cannot describe my complete surprise and joy! But it was not without a tinge of guilt as so many others who are more qualified than myself are not able to go. This is a huge thing that's going to happen, and I can't even imagine what it will be like.

Vancouver! Winter Olympics! I'll be there? Yeah, I guess I will.

May the LORD who has brought me here receive ALL the glory and praise. Without His work in my life (I'm still wondering why He chose me), I would be nothing.